"Court Case Friday" There are/is a plethora of jokes about lawyers. Jokes about judges are a little harder to come by. Perhaps it is our reputation for being “sober as a judge.” Here are a few: What do you call a law school graduate who got "A's"? “Professor”What do you call a law student graduate … Continue reading Jokes About Judges
"Sunday Sermon" The Highlight of My Week Attending church is a pain - literally. I am convinced that the pews and chairs were designed by the devil himself. My wife observes the sweat on the back of my head as the barometer of my back pain. Sometimes, it takes days for my back pain to … Continue reading The Sacrament – A Time to “Remember”
"Court Case Friday" I have announced my retirement for January 31, 2024. Now, instead of asking me, "When are you going to retire?" everyone is asking, "Why are you suddenly retiring after 35 years on the bench?" Here are 6 minor reasons: ** *Everyone in the courthouse has conspired to talk softer, making it harder … Continue reading 6 Reasons Why I Have Finally Decided to Retire
"Court Case Friday" People often ask me why I haven’t retired. After all, I’m certainly old enough. I’ve been a judge 35 years. And I could have retired 12 years ago. But: I win all the arguments. I always get the last word. People laugh at my jokes. It’s the only place I get respect. … Continue reading 5 Simple Reasons I Haven’t Retired – Yet
"Court Case Friday" I received a phone call in the middle of the night from the O.C. Sheriff’s Judicial Protection Unit (JPU). A reliable informant “snitched” that his accomplice was going to assassinate a judge because he was “Mormon.” The threat was credible. The JPU called me, and wanted to know the names of the other LDS … Continue reading Threat to Assassinate a Mormon Judge
"Court Case Friday" The Obscenity Trial One hot summer afternoon, in the 1970s, an O.C. Judge was presiding over an adult obscenity jury trial. The air conditioning wasn’t working. The courtroom lights were off. And the judge had way too much to drink during lunch. After lunch, while the film played, the judge passed out … Continue reading Drunk Judge Passed Out During Trial
"Court Case Friday" The best new judges have experience in the field of law in which they are presiding, and experience in court handling hearings and trials. New judges who lacked such expertise can be a disaster. One of our new judges was a city government official. He did not practice law, and he had … Continue reading Another Bizarre Court Ruling – Small Claims Auto Accident
"Court Case Friday" The best new judges have extensive experience in the field of law in which they are presiding. They also have major experience in courtroom hearings and trials. New judges who lacked such expertise can be a disaster. As an experienced prosecutor, I was assigned to respond to the defense motion to suppress … Continue reading Bizarre Ruling – Judge Outraged by the Officer’s Gun
"Memorable Stories" In 1989, I attended the 2-week “Judges College” for new judges at U.C. Berkeley. We stayed in the student dorms and ate breakfast and lunch in the cafeteria. For dinners, we were on our own. I had a county allowance of $100 for dinners - $7 per meal. (In today’s money that would … Continue reading My Most Expensive Meal Ever
"Court Case Friday" The best new judges have extensive experience in the field of law in which they are presiding. They also have major courtroom experience. A new judge who lacks such expertise is a "fish out of water," and can be a disaster. 25 lbs of Marijuana When I was a prosecutor, a new … Continue reading Bizarre Ruling – Judge Orders the Police to Return Illegal Drugs to the Criminals
The London Edition 